Acceptance and Inclusion – core values

I’m aiming to make this a very short blog post (let’s see how I go) around acceptance and inclusion and ObSec. I am writing up the players rights and responsibilities that M and I discussed on the last two podcasts and I have added in the following statement:

Our core values at Objective Secured have always included acceptance and inclusion. In our events and in the gaming spaces we strive to create we welcome people from all walks of life, all genders and orientations, all religions and cultures, all ethnicities and all neurodiversity. 

M isn’t really one for mission statements, visions, organisational philosophy and values. I am. Surprise, surprise. So when I wrote this I knew that M is going to be really annoyed that I am including it in the Bill of Rights.  I know this because we have argued about this debated this very topic (that sounds better doesn’t it?) more than a few times. It’s not that he doesn’t agree with the statement. He does! It is that he doesn’t think we should have to say it out loud or write it down.

It SHOULD be obvious.

It should be obvious. He has literally asked me ‘Are we just doing this to be politically correct?’ Why would anyone question that they would be included? If you play one of the games we are running an event for, you are welcome. It’s as simple as that. In his mind he doesn’t care if you are black, white, purple or blue, so long as you want to roll dice (or what ever game mechanic is in use!) and move models around a table you are welcome.

I love that philosophy! I wish it were as simple as that. I hope that anyone who has experienced M and I, either in person, via social media or the pod cast or through this blog knows that they are welcome at any of the events that we run. I hope that that has been the experience of the players who have attended an event. If it hasn’t been please let me know! I want to know what we can do to make events feel inclusive and be inclusive!

Sadly though I don’t think it is that simple.

I really want players to know…

I want and need people in our community to know that you are welcome at our events regardless of any defining feature or defining label. Equally, I want and need the loved ones and families of players to know that players are welcomed and accepted regardless of labels.

So to answer M’s question, no, I’m not writing it to be politically correct. I’m writing it because I honestly believe it.  I hope that we live the values of inclusion and acceptance and display those values, I hope that people who meet us experience that from us.  But what about the people who haven’t come to an event yet because they don’t know how they will be accepted or how they will be treated? I can’t think of any way of sharing with the people who haven’t yet found the courage to come along to an event that they will be welcome unless I just come out and say it. So this is me saying it!

I really want and need for players to know that you are welcome at our events regardless of any label you may carry. Equally I want and need for the family and loved ones of players who may carry a defining label to know that your loved one is safe! They will be welcomed, accepted and appreciated.

I am not sure if I can adequately describe this but hopefully I can convey my meaning. I will preface this with; we don’t see a person’s race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion, diagnosis, etc as defining them but I am aware that the individuals can often see those as defining features (we are more likely to define players as 40k players, Aos, Bolt Action etc or necron vs orks, i.e. I have never heard someone described as the gay, Asian with PTSD, but I have heard many players described as ‘he was playing the blue eldar with the the big wraith knight) but for the purpose of the rest of this post I will describe ethnicity/race/orientation/neurodiversity etc as a label or defining factor purely for ease of typing.

We don’t accept and welcome people despite their label/defining factor or because of their label/defining factor, the label is part of who you are and YOU are welcomed. It’s part of you and you are welcomed so that label is welcomed into the room and the event as well. In the same way, we don’t celebrate diversity because we aren’t Pokemon, we aren’t out to collect all the different labels and celebrate that we have them all in the same room. We just see every individual as a person and we want to make the events as inclusive to all people as possible! *note; I am aware I do get very excited when we have women in the room and I do celebrate that, 15 years working in a women’s organisation, some habits are hard to break!

Let us know and we will try and help.

I am painfully shy (I just pretend not to be! You know the saying ‘fake it until you make it’? well I have been faking it for 25 years now, anyone know how long the fake it stage should last?), while I am aware that being shy is significantly different to having a past experience of discrimination or fearing discrimination I know how hard it can be at times to get up the courage to walk through the doors.

If you would like to come along, but, for whatever reason, you feel uncomfortable walking through the doors please send M or I a message and let us know. We will make sure we welcome you and make some introductions so you don’t feel alone when you arrive. If past experience is anything to go by, by lunchtime you will fit right in!

I am also keenly aware of how hard it can be as a loved one to watch someone I love go to an event and worry how they will go. Will they fit in? Will they talk to anyone or will they stand in a corner alone? Will they have the courage to actually walk in? How will they cope with the crowd? How will they cope if they lose? What if they overreact, how will everyone else respond? Will they judge? Will they never want my loved one to go back?

So if you are a parent or loved one and find yourself in those shoe of worrying over everything, again, I encourage you to get in touch (with your loved ones permission of course) and let us know. We will do everything we can to make them feel welcome and a part of the community that we are working to grow!

Again, I have written more than I intended and shared more than I probably should have.

P.S

PS I just told M I had written this blog post.  That was a mistake! I read him the value statement and he said ‘why do you think I wouldn’t like that?’ So I explained why I thought he wouldn’t like it and he said ‘yes, exactly, it’s totally ridiculous…’ and then proceeded to go on a 15 minute rant. I should have known better than to get him started!